Buckle-Up. My Facebook Aha! Moment.

It's been 284 days. I feel like last night I had a major Facebook "aha moment." Oh God is good!

Buckle-up, because here goes...

I hope you stay with me until the end of this post. 

For those that have been following my journey since the beginning, you know I struggled with Facebook being the biggest time waster in my life. I felt I wasn't being productive with it, and I felt like the Lord was literally putting a check inside me enough to rid myself from it for 365 days and in the process to blog about my experience. Blogging was a complete unknown to me. On my final day on Facebook I actually posted asking my friends what blog site to use to begin this journey. 

Looking back, it's funny how I used the word time waster. I think that was my clever way in my mind of shifting the blame of my own lack of self-control and instead, acting as the victim in many ways and saying Facebook was responsible. Oh man I want to laugh and cry at the same time. For me it really took 284 days to truly grasp this understanding. I had no idea why I felt the need to make this change for an entire year, but now I know. God knew I wouldn't have fully understood this idea if I only dealt with it for a month, 3 months or even 6 months. wow. Once again, our God is good and He knows us better than we know ourselves. 

Okay, so back to this "aha moment." I realized this while I was in a class on counseling last night at my church. Funny that as I was learning about how to counsel others, I was being counseled myself. Humbling.  There was so much information in this class I will leave for an entirely new post, but here are a few things that contributed to this "aha moment."

I learned that in abstaining from what I felt was my "time waster" was actually more of a self-righteous act of sin management. That may sound harsh and you may be asking... what do I mean exactly? Well, let me give you a few examples that were given to me...

Say your husband has a problem with looking at pornography. While abstaining from it is a good thing hands down, it doesn't stop the deeper issue of lust and discontentment that drove him to fall into that in the first place.

OR 

Working out and eating healthy is good, but it won't stop you from dealing with insecurity. We will just find another thing about ourselves that we aren't satisfied with.

We make these checklists of "dos and don't" in order to keep our sin at bay. I know the word sin scares some people. Some people don't like to use the word. I don't really like it either. But I think that is normal. We are supposed to hate sin. ☺ Sin is the falling short of the glory of God that we all have in our lives. It's okay to talk about it! 

"for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God, and are justified by his grace as a gift, through the redemption that is in Christ Jesus." Romans 3:24.

So back to the aha moment...

Is it good that I have abstained? Absolutely. It has brought me much clarity.   

And for many things in life we should fully abstain from them because there is no good in them. But Facebook... while there are things that I don't love about it, that isn't so much the issue. I even knew that from day one when I explained that I know Facebook is not the devil. You can read about that here.

I realized in my first months of blogging that I did start to grasp the understanding that it wasn't about Facebook in general, it was about my heart. I knew that, but I still wasn't sure if I felt a change. The thing is, we can't make this change our-self.

You can't free yourself. It will only last a matter of time.
Rules can't free you.
Practical tactics can't free you.
Checklists can't free you.
Methods, techniques, and boundaries can't free you.
Different circumstances can't free you.
Wherever you go, there you are.

People and situations do not determine our behavior; they provide the occasion where our behavior reveals our hearts. - Paul Tripp

Only Jesus can. He already died on the cross bearing the burden of our sins. It is finished.

My pastor put it perfectly last night. You worship your way into sin, now we must worship our way out. Turning my heart back to God, focusing on God's promises, and believing God is who He said He is. We are called to repent, and not feel guilty about it! This is the road the Lord has shown to me. And guess what, he used other people to do so in the process. 

Looking back, this issue with self-control has been long time coming... I have dealt with drinking more than I should, to being addicted to ephedra {diet} pills..among other things. Once I "managed" those issues myself, my lack of self-control showed up in different ways. Facebook being one of them. I've heard myself say to people, "I have an addictive personality." I will not say that anymore. Who can that help? Not even myself. The truth is, I have an issue with self-control and I need to face it.

I have. With God's help. Not by my own doing. I am made new in Him.

{And I know I will always be a work in progress}

It comes down to this...

I don't want a life that is just about self improvement.  

I want a life that is about glorifying God because only there will I find true freedom. 

Now that is something to "like"

Right now that's what I truly feel in my heart. I feel free from the burden of self-control. I feel like I could get back on Facebook and with the Lord at my side I would be a different person. I guess that means in 81 more days I might have to change the name of my blog... hmm... I'll cross that bridge when I get there. 

I encourage you to think about things that you spend your most time on...are they becoming idols? Is it really a deeper issue? Check yourself and ask God if there is something He wants to show you... somewhere He wants to do a work in you. It's worth it. I promise. ♥

"Delight yourself in the Lord and He will give you the desires of your heart." Psalm 37:4

{Linking up here,  here,  here, here, here. }