You'll Never Know

I had a friend text me the other day out of the blue to catch up a little. I truly appreciated hearing from her and our little text convo made me smile. She said something to me throughout the course of the convo that made me think and it was simply this: miss reading ur blog. That was even the exact type that came through. I responded with a short excuse as to why I've been slacking lately, but that comment hasn't left my mind since. My lack of blogging definitely hasn't been because of a lack of thinking or learning over here. I guess sometimes I start thinking too much and wondering how much I really should share with the entire internet about my life and who really cares anyways? We all are so busy, we all have crazy things happening all the time..right? Well, the truth is that we really never will know the extent that we touch someone else's life. Whether it be in a good way, bad, or whatever. Something I might share that I find perfectly pointless or overly simple might really reach someone on a different level. My daughter and I were sitting on her bedroom floor and having a tea party a few days ago and I decided it would be a perfect time to teach her the song "I'm A Little Teapot." It seemed so silly at the time and guess what, now it's her new favorite song and she sings it to almost anyone that will listen. Of course, this relates only slightly to my point that you don't know how much you will touch someone elses' life because she is my daughter and an absolute sponge, but still, maybe just a very small example. Anyways, I think you all will start seeing more posts from me again... thank you to that person that texted me. You know who you are. ☺

Today just so happens to be my cousin's birthday. She is actually my cousin's wife, but cousin-in-law is too long, so cousin works just the same. When I think about her on her birthday, many memories surface, but one of the things I think of the most is that she and her husband (my cousin) were the ones that brought my husband and I to church what will be 6 years ago this fall. I know that most of my posts are about the Lord and scripture and whatnot and I just have felt like I wanted to share a little bit more of my story, because trust me, I have not always dreamed of writing a blog to bring glory to the Lord. lol. Anyways, my now husband and I were dating at the time and both of us come from different backgrounds when it comes to beliefs and church. For the sake of your poor eyes reading all this text, I'll keep this very simple and feel free to email me for more details. haha. My husband was raised Catholic and was an alter boy up until the point that he outgrew the uniform. I'm not sure if they call them uniforms, but we will just go with that for now. I, on the other hand, grew up in a Christian home. I went to church camps all through high school, but it wasn't until I was 19 that I decided I really wanted to find out if what I believed was because of the home I was raised in, or if I really believed what I believed for myself. Well, from about 19 until 23 years old when my cousin dragged me into the church I am still a part of to this day a lot of things happened in my young life. I won't go into details, but let's just say my idea of a perfect little future was shattered in many ways. I think we all get hit with this reality at some point in our lives. Some sooner than others.

I'd love to ask my cousin if she remembers how many times she asked me to come to church before I actually did. I do remember the day we went, I remember the topic that was addressed and I remember my husband and I both leaving utterly convicted. When I say husband now, we were just boyfriend/girlfriend at the time. It was as if the preacher was speaking directly to us. Thankfully, we both wanted to respond to the message in the same way. We wanted to change our lives. I remember leaving that sermon and it was so different. It was as if my eyes were opened for the first time in a long time. We didn't have many words as we left. There was nothing to fight about. There was nothing to ridicule the preacher for. There was nothing we wanted to do except change and you better believe we were back to church the next weekend. It was odd. I remembered leaving church in my young 20s when I was going through a phase of searching out my true beliefs and the first thing I would think about when I left was, "gosh, I wish there were more cute guys at this church." My sister can attest because we would both talk about it the whole way home. So funny how things change. Now I was going to church to actually learn about God and this guy Jesus and because I wanted to change my life for the better. Who was in the audience was of little interest to me. Another funny thing, well not so funny at the time, was that right after we started going to church, my husband and I probably went through one of the most difficult years in both of our lives. I thought going back to church was supposed to make things easier! Ya right. If anyone ever tells you that it is an utter lie.


"Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds, for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness. And let steadfastness have its full effect, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing." James 1:2-4.  

Looking back, and even at the time, I still tell people that God in his sovereignty completely had everything in control. I know that if I did not have the people in my life, the church, and the new relationship with the Lord that at that time of extreme trial I would never have made it out alive. Okay, maybe alive, but definitely not sane. lol. I'm sure you all can relate to times that you feel so incredibly helpless. This is life. There is a lot of beauty, but at the same time there is a lot of pain. It's part of living in this fallen world full of imperfect people. Being able to still have hope and knowing that the Lord will not forsake me despite the tidal waves around us is what I now live for.

Now I'm slightly losing my thought process here and I'm not sure where I was or am going with this post. Not too surprising. Probably because the kids are about to wake up and it's about time for me to put on one of my most important hats that I wear theses days and that's my MOM hat. I think I'll end this before rambling for too long, but more to come. Happy birthday to my cousin that I will always thank for planting that seed and bringing me back to my faith. Something I just want to continue to remind myself is that you just never know how much your presence will touch someone else. Makes everything you do... and say... and text... and post seem just a tad more important doesn't it? ♥